Privacy Policy

Last Updated:7th June 2026

Welcome to the Privacy Policy. This page exists because websites are expected to have one and because seeing a "Privacy Policy" link at the bottom of a website makes everything look approximately 73% more professional.

The Cookie Banner

You may have noticed a cookie banner appearing on this website. Before you panic, celebrate, or begin reading legal textbooks, please note the following:

• The cookie banner is currently an experimental feature with no actual functionality behind it.
• Pressing "Accept" does not activate anything.
• Pressing "Decline" does not deactivate anything.
• It is, in scientific terms, a decorative rectangle.

What Information Do We Collect?

The answer is surprisingly simple: Basically nothing. We do not track your browsing habits, favourite pizza toppings, or the location of buried treasure.

Shop Orders

If you choose to purchase something through the shop, you may voluntarily provide information such as your name, email address, and delivery information. This info is used exclusively so we can get your order to you without launching it into the nearest forest.

Zombie Apocalypse Policy

In the event of a total societal collapse, the following conditions apply:

• No refunds will be available.
• No deliveries will be made to zombie-controlled regions.
• If your package is eaten by zombies, this is considered outside our control.
• Any attempts by zombies to place orders will be reviewed on a case-by-case basis.

Final Notes

By using this website, you acknowledge that zombies are not eligible for refunds and that this document should not be taken more seriously than necessary.

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